DNP Ep. 83: The Resiliency of Moms with Special Guest My Mom, Annette Pryor

Dr. Sandra Pagenta: Dr. Nurse Podcast Nation, welcome to another episode of the Doctor Nurse Podcast. I’m your host Sandra Pagenta, and I am so happy to have on today for the podcast, a special Motherhood Mother’s Day episode with my mom. Hi, how are you guys? Welcome to the podcast, mom.

Annette Pryor: I’m excited for doing this. Yeah, it’s gonna be an exciting episode.

Dr. Sandra Pagenta: We decided to do this because we were like, I, I was thinking, you know, mother’s Day was yesterday, let’s launch a podcast episode with my mom so that people can kind of see where I’m from and who raised me the values and the, and the the morals and all the things that are. Tantamount to who I am as a person, stem from this person.

So I thought it would be cool to chat.

Annette Pryor: Thank you for having me in your show. I’m excited Yeah. To share this time with you and your audience.

Dr. Sandra Pagenta: Yeah. So I wanna tell start off by kinda introducing you. This is what I do with all my guest mom. My mom’s our number one podcast fan, so she’s used to this. My mom is a retired teacher.

She taught in the school system for almost 20 years, and she is the mom of three. And on top of that, she. Was a stay-at-home mom for the first part of her career, and then the second half of her career was being a teacher, which she retired from. And then throughout this whole process, she also became an entrepreneur, had multiple rental properties has been able to grow a little side hustle business while working as a teacher.

So super inspiring and I know that you’re gonna have a lot to kind of share with my guests today. Oh, I’m, I’m

Annette Pryor: willing to do so. I, the things that I have learned, if I can share with others to do the same thing, I think that those will be amazing.

Dr. Sandra Pagenta: Yeah. All right. So again, tell us a little bit about. Yourself, mom, and how you grew up, where you kind of stem from.

Annette Pryor: Okay. I was born in Hoboken, New Jersey. I was raised there, well, I stayed there for six years and then my parents had a, we moved to, Puerto Rico, that, that’s where I was raised. I was there from six to 10 18, and then I moved to Charlotte. Then I moved to Memphis, and then I came to Jacksonville in 1982. And then what happened in 1982? In 1982 or maybe maybe

Dr. Sandra Pagenta: 84? 80,

Annette Pryor: 84. I got married and then I have Sandra, my first child, I was working for the bank and I was doing a fashion merchandising degree, and I finished in 1987.

That was my first. Willing to wanna do something besides being a mom, even though I love being a mom. But I wanted to finish that since I started it and I finished in 1987, my first two years associates and that kind of stuff.

Dr. Sandra Pagenta: Interesting. So you got. You got married to dad, had three babies and worked on your degree while you had your two children, and then I think Ben Elena was born in 89.

Yes. So that was your first two and then you finished it up before your third, which is pretty hard to do. I mean, as a, as a mom myself, I can’t imagine trying to do school and have the kids and be all the other things that you had to do. On top of trying to improve yourself, that’s tough. Yeah. And especially from where you came from.

So I feel like, you know, really being honest with my guest, you came from Puerto Rico and it wasn’t like you came over on a super nice flight. No. First class. First class situation. I mean, you came with just a suitcase correct.

Annette Pryor: Yes. I was gonna say that. I came with two suitcases.

Dr. Sandra Pagenta: Oh I’m so sorry. They were yellow. I made it more dramatic, didn’t I?

Annette Pryor: Yes, you they were yellow and I had a brown dress. I will never forget that because I always liked fashion. When I graduated from high school, I finished a deca. I’m not sure if you remember what that is, but it’s a business kinda track. When you graduated from high school, A DECA program?

Yes. Okay. And that’s why I always liked fashion and I said, I’m gonna match my dress with my suitcase, but I did not have anything in my suitcase. It was like maybe five outfits. That’s, that’s it.

Dr. Sandra Pagenta: Oh my goodness. So you came over here from Puerto Rico. To the states, which they call like mainland, United States mainland.

And you literally had a suitcase with just five dresses and that was all your mom sent you with Yes. To go and launch yourself world. Yes. That’s pretty incredible, mom. Yes. I mean, again, I think my listeners, you know, They, they can tell that I always fight for resiliency to, to try to improve yourself, to always be better.

And I think a lot of that stems from who you are and how you raised us, and that mentality that you ingrained in all your children. Because I know that you, my mom, and this is a joke, you know, for all those that are listening, you know, she raised me as a nurse practitioner to always get more education, pursue the highest level of everything that you could.

As, as a kid, she always drilled that home. But then also you raised another daughter who went off and became it.

Annette Pryor: She’s a lawyer at Boston university, but she’s not practicing as much as she is working with diversity and inclusion

Dr. Sandra Pagenta: you’ve got a son who also works on the ex, you know, the director level in a, in a company. Yes. Humana. And he has his mba. So you’ve done a good job at kind of driving home that message to all your children to pursue education. Where does that come from?

Annette Pryor: Well, my philosophy in this is that we have a lot of obstacles in our life.

It can be our, the way we look, it can be our speech or how we sound and those. Barriers that our society has. I think that education is one that you can seek without having anyone determine what is best for you or how you’re gonna go there to get it. If you apply yourself and go to school and try to finish, degrees there are.

Some people are, some of the people are easy for them to get, and other ones it’s more difficult. But if you can reach them because you have the ability, I think that you should do better. So the doors will open for you and you don’t have excuses to say, well this person did not give me this, or This person did not gave me that.

Well, if you have the education and the willingness to work and prove yourself, then I think No one is gonna stop you from doing those things. Yeah. And doing the right thing.

Dr. Sandra Pagenta: I think one of the things you always used to say growing up to us was that education was something nobody could ever take away from you.

Exactly. And I think maybe, and again, I I’m to correct me if I’m wrong, but whenever you, you know, are born, and I, I remember your aunt, my aunts, you’re one of 11, correct? 11, yes. One 11. So, you know, you’re one of 11 and you’re. Born with, you know, having to share a lot. Yes. And having to also see things kind of come and go because you just don’t have a lot of money as a family.

You know, you get this mentality that you know, well, what can I have that no one can take away? Exactly. Right. And so that’s something I remember growing up a lot. You used to say that education nobody can take from you. And so make sure to get that. Because I think one of the things that I’ve, I’ve seen, I’ve noticed as we’ve.

As we’ve gotten older is that education and how you use your brain and how you work your brain, I think determines how you do anything in life. So what you really begin to see is not only do you cultivate the degrees, but you also cultivate the mindset of work. Yes. And so that part, no one can ever take away with you away from you because you can outwork.

Most people, even in your sixties, that is still the case that my mom can get out in the yard and outwork most people in the yard. Remember the guys that were doing the yard work? We hired some guys to do yard work, and I remember I came to check on you and I was coming by to supervise whatever was going on.

And the, there were, these were young guys and they were like, What is up with your mother? She’s out in the field working and I’m like, it’s literally ingrained in her. She can’t stop. I’m never gonna forget that.

Annette Pryor: Well, I do love to work and I do believe that some things people cannot take away from you if your ability to do a job at.

A high level that is done correctly for whatever it is. It can be for patients or it can be for clients, or it can be for an organization like my son he’s director for Humana. He has to. Produce papers or help to get lobbying. Lobbying mm-hmm. And that kind of stuff, that, that means that he has to work and produce things that I think that the bottom line, you want to be busy creating things that can change the world and be a place for.

Dr. Sandra Pagenta: For better improvement. Yeah. To make the world a better place. Yeah, better please. I like that. I like that. So a lot of the women that listen to my podcast could be in that exact situation. They have children, they’re trying to figure out like, okay, so I’m killing myself at this nursing job. I’m exhausted.

I’ve got kids and I’m trying to create a side hustle gig. And one of the side hustle gigs that you created you started to invest in real estate. Yes, I did. So that was something that you really set. Apart yourself from other siblings of yours, just other people in general, because most people weren’t doing what you were doing 30, 40 years ago were, it’s starting to rent properties, collect money from renters and that kind of thing.

So how did you. Kind of start off on this new path of a side hustle. How’d you kind of launch that?

Annette Pryor: Well, I was a teacher for 23 years, if I’m not mistaken. I would sit at my desk and I would say, oh my God, I’m making a thousand dollars every year increase. Oh, I said, I see what, and I was thinking, that is not a lot of money.

A thousand dollars. Back then it was. 35,000 a year, 37. It was not really a lot of money, but one day I decided I wanted to move to a better house and I told my husband, I want to rent this house. I was scared to death. I was scared about renting the property.

Police scared, and I decided, I said, oh Lord, if I’m doing the right thing, I don’t know what I’m doing the right thing. And he says, well, clearly it is like I’m talking to you. He said, this house will never be empty. And his faithfulness has been true. That property has never been empty. And is, we bought it in 79.

Yeah. Oh, no, no, no, no. 97. 97. We bought that in 97. Yeah. You started renting it in 97. Yes. Yeah. And that property has been rented, but I do take care of it. Yes. It’s not like I don’t take care of the property. I do things that I need to do.

Dr. Sandra Pagenta: Because one of the things that you were afraid of by renting out property was that you could potentially have two mortgages.

And Yes. Could you hold that? You know, could you, could you have sustained two mortgages?

Thanks for listening to the episode. I hope you’re enjoying the conversation. I wanted to take this time and remind you to check out the success. NP Etsy shop. It’s a shop that I design with my best girlfriend, cute nurse practitioner gear hats. Bags, anything you could think of as well as adorable digital products.

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Annette Pryor: Exactly. And I said, oh my God, this is not gonna work. This this is not gonna work. This is not work. But it worked because the money that I was making, I was investing back into the house they were paying and I was paying.

Mm-hmm. That, that was my first paid house. Yeah. That, that is how we got to have several other ones that they already paid because we did not take our money and say, oh, we’re gonna go to a cruise, or we are gonna buy a better car. Even though I did have little Volkswagens convertible Volkswagens.

Dr. Sandra Pagenta: So you had cards, but yes.

Like you saw, like you’re driving a hoop. I know. We barely had,

Annette Pryor: yeah, yeah, yeah. But it was a lot of the, the process has been a lot of fun. Challenging, has taught me a lot about working and how to get people that come in and do the work.

I have worked with roofers, contractors. Mm-hmm. Work with roofers, I did remodel brand new, you know, like it’s kitchen, and I changed the, the appliances I, the floors, the carpet. I learned all of that while I was teaching. And I was looking at my thousand dollars every month. Every year.

Every year. Yeah. Yeah. And thinking, oh my God, this is not gonna break. This is not gonna make it. And the mainly I did is because I knew that if I wanna have my kids going to school or high education, I needed a place for them to stay in. I. That’s why, how all of this started. Yeah.

Dr. Sandra Pagenta: So I think the, the, the drive home message is that you did it scared, right?

Oh yeah. And so, you know, most people think like, oh, I could never do it. I, I, this can’t happen. You know, this is gonna be taking a risk. But what you began to see was it was risky looking at your small incremental raises every year and thinking this can’t be it. That seemed like more of a risk to you Yes.

Than really looking at, you know, what, what if we just. Throw our chips in and get a rental property and see what we can do with this. And again. Exactly. It’s not like at that very moment it was a golden egg ticket that you were able to go Oh no. Wasn’t like I said, take everybody on cruises and do all this stuff.

Yes. It was a slow grind. Yes. And I remember it. Going to properties with you as a young kid and helping you do yard work. I mean, you, you instilled that in us from the time we were very little to, you chip in as a family, you work, we’re all building the dream here. And that’s kind of, That mentality, and I think it has a lot to do with how you grew up.

Again, for those that are listening and hearing. Okay, so Miss, you know Mo, you know Sandra’s mom came from money. I’m telling you guys, she literally came with two suitcases from Puerto Rico with a high school education. And again, you did not have a lot of money of being one of 11. You grew up in like a two bedroom home, wasn’t that correct?

Annette Pryor:  Well, no, it was a little bit bigger than that. But I do have to say that my father, when we were in New Jersey, he had a bodega that is a small store. He really was not afraid of doing the job that needed to be done for a family of 11. But we had a bodega and that is mainly why we left. We went back to Puerto Rico because it caught in fire and we lost.

Everything. And, and that is when we decided to go back to Puerto Rico and he bat li land and he would grow vegetables and he had cows and he kind of start, he went that direction. Mm-hmm. Even though, you know, he wanted to be more as a business person, but he didn’t have the skills to do it. Got it.

Dr. Sandra Pagenta: So you think that that’s kind of the spark of the entrepreneurial skills?

Yes. I think it’s, Comes from watching your dad do that entrepreneurial struggle. Yes. And then again, I, I like to say there’s a lot of my podcast that when you do things scared and you have these ups and downs in life, it shows that you’re alive. So, exactly. You describe, like, I ended up learning a lot through these processes and through, you know, roofer problems and floor problems.

Yes. And how, you know, how do we fix this and how do we, you know, manage the budget and how do we, you know, you didn’t get a. A template. There were no courses back then. No what to do. And so you just kind of trouble shotted and did it scared. And again, I think that’s a good lesson for those listening. Yes,

Annette Pryor: I was going to First Baptist Church downtown Jacksonville, and I knew a lady that really, I cannot remember her name, I’m sorry.

Not, you know, as you get older, forget people’s names. But she had nine houses. I’m thinking, oh my God, nine houses, that is amazing, but how you doing it? She says, well, I I’m going to debt for them and I’m doing this and doing that, or whatever, and I said, I just don’t feel comfortable taking that many and being in charge of that many and people and that kind of stuff.

I told her, I said, I start little by literal and. I remember when in 89 on, I cannot remember what exactly what year it was, the crash. Mm-hmm. And she lost some of those houses because, They, she couldn’t sell them. And I said, well, I think that I’m gonna go this route better. I’m gonna get one at the time.

Slow by slow, like the turtle and the, so

Dr. Sandra Pagenta: I was thinking as you were talking, it was the turtle

Annette Pryor: in the air. Yeah. Yeah. And then slow by slow. I was trying to kind of get, the turtle makes it. Yes, and that’s exactly what I was doing. The

Dr. Sandra Pagenta: turtle made it. Yeah, no, it’s true. It goes back like you’re saying, like you’re rushing to do things and you think it’s gonna be this quick fix, and you’ve kind of, again, perfected the overtime building, slow building of the side hustle that turns into a full grown.

Beast because I believe that, that, from what I’m understanding, again briefly, about what you and dad have been able to build it’s, it’s enough to sustain a family, which is the, in the rental income that you bring in Yes. From your properties. Yeah. So again, it can be done. For Mother’s Day, what would you say for those listening today is one of the things that you wish you would’ve known at the start of becoming a mom that you would’ve held on to or you say hold on to throughout your entire time of being a mom in the struggle. Working to make things happen. You know, you were a stay-at-home mom and then you went to work and you were a working mom, and then now you’re a working mom with the side hustle.

What is something you wish you could have gone back to tell yourself that day you got off the plane from Puerto Rico that you would’ve told that girl to hold onto the rest of her life to be consistent?

Annette Pryor: And not to waiver. I think that when people waiver from their desires and their willingness to do whatever they want to do in life and they take a detour mm-hmm.

That detour is gonna take you longer to get there. Mm-hmm. But if you honestly look at your life and say, I am not going to back down. I am going to keep in this, direction and, and I’m gonna work hard and I’m gonna do whatever you are at the end, you will make it. Yeah, it can be a, a profession, a better, you know, a better job.

It can be a family that’s a healthy family and do not waiver in your thoughts and your beliefs in a, and you need to believe in a higher power, whatever that is. I think that a higher power, I think that is important cuz we cannot make it by without it. Yeah,

Dr. Sandra Pagenta: I love this. And what you were talking about makes me think of this quote.

Success is not always about greatness. It’s about consistency. Consistent hard work leads to success. Greatness will come by Dwayne Johnson. I mean, that’s just one quote, but I’ve heard it said multiple times that it is honestly about the consistency more so than the greatness. Yes. And I think that you’ve said it so well that that has been one thing that you and dad have done, you know, consistently.

Has been the showing up and that, and they think that part has been over time. People ask me like, how did your parents do this? How did your parents create this portfolio? And they have all this stuff. And I, I’m just like, honestly, I, I just think they just, they never stopped. They just kept going. And so I think that’s kind of the message I think most people can, I think I want people to hear from today is just keep going.

Just keep. Pushing.

Annette Pryor: Well, I, it doesn’t really matter what age. I think it sometimes, you know, I went back to school at 63 taking some archives. Oh yeah,

Dr. Sandra Pagenta: that’s right. You don’t ever stop. I mean, yeah, we gotta tell people about that. I mean, you’re currently, so you’re retired to help me take care of Benjamin.

I remember that. And yeah, I was telling her, I was telling her I would have to go back to work and you, you decided to retire. You were like, okay, I’ll watch it while you’re at work. And I’m like, you’re gonna do what? And you’re like, yeah. And you retired to watch Benji. And then she’s very cute. And then whenever you.

You get like your free time and you’re not taking care of grandkids or chasing after, you know, your grown children. You go back to school even in your sixties. And what are you pursuing right now? Well,

Annette Pryor: I’m taking art classes. Yeah. Took a three dimensional course that I learned about pottery and pottery and painting.

Hey, it’s never too late. I say you keep going and the thing Yes. About you keep going is kind of feels that your time in in here and earth is going fast, but you are enjoying the ride. Yeah. It’s not like you’re sitting and just looking at each other and time is going to pass by. Might as well do something that you enjoy doing and that is how I’m

Dr. Sandra Pagenta: doing it.

Yeah. I think that’s another thing I would like to. To add to your story is that you’ve always been a lifelong learner. I mean, from the time that you stepped off the plane and you got to work and you’ve always just been pursuing something, almost just like with a dog with a bone, you just won’t let it go.

And so I just remember you studying cuz again, you came with a high school diploma, you got your assn. While we were little, but it didn’t necessarily equate to like, You know, a, a direct job. Yes. And then I remember you studying and working hard to get your bachelor’s degree. Yeah. While you had three kids.

And then after you’ve finished your bachelor’s, you’ve always been learning about something, doing something, cross stitched, sewing. I mean, you’ve just always been. Busy doing something. So it’s very inspiring, mom. Well, on Mother’s Day, to have a mom that constantly through her example, shows herself to be a hard worker.

So thank you for, for doing that. And I think that for my listeners out there it’s encouraging just to hear. That you can do it

Annette Pryor: too. Everybody can do it and get around people that really can teach you new things and ideas. I would say that Dave Ramsey, the guy that talks about the snowball effect

Dr. Sandra Pagenta: of Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

For the, debt

Annette Pryor: snowball. That snowball is Example of listening to people that give you ideas and then you decide that you are going follow those ideas, see if it works, cuz you never know, but mm-hmm. I remember we taking the classes, Kevin and I, and you’re talking about the financial peace process, financial place, peace class, and we decided we gonna follow that.

Logic and sure enough it worked out. But I think that we are listening to do today at so many people that the logic is not, beneficial to individuals to make them do better and be better. And that is why we have the breakdown in our society. But I think that if we listen to people that have values and have ideas, there are.

Like, like out there. But honestly, sometimes you look it at it, just, if you think about it, they kind of don’t make any sense, but you’re thinking, I’m gonna try it anyhow and see what it works. If it works and, and if it works, then more power to

Dr. Sandra Pagenta: you. Yeah. Kind of makes me think of like the. The salmon swimming upstream, right?

Yeah. So like you could just go with the rest of the world, right? Which is broke, miserable, sad, chasing after looking like everyone else, you know, keeping up with the Joneses type thing. Yes. Or you could be that salmon that’s like, you know what, I’m not gonna buy nine houses right off the bat. I’m gonna slowly build my.

My real estate portfolio, I’m going to, you know, methodically get out of debt to set myself free. Free. I’m going to, you know, work hard on these things that Yeah, most people would either let go cuz the consistency kills them. Yes. Right. When they wanna just feel good now. Yeah. So I think that those are the concepts that you really honed in on as you were.

Pursuing your career and pursuing financial freedom and things that you were able to do for yourself.

Annette Pryor: And that is so true. And I think that the bottom line too, that sometimes people don’t wanna see you succeed. That is always a, because we are na by nature, we are jealous. Individuals. That’s why we compete with having the better house or having the better car, or having the better traveling.

But if we are saying to ourselves, let’s do something that is out there, then nobody really is gonna be paying attention. Hmm. But the benefit is so much bigger. Then competing with other people. I think you will see the benefits of it. Sooner or later, you will see the benefits of it. You might not see it when you are in this strange, you know, like working and you’re trying to do everything.

But at the end of the journey, you will see that it panned out for you.

Dr. Sandra Pagenta: Yeah, it made me think of when you were saying that like when you’re looking at everybody else, you’re competing with everyone around you. If you actually just compete with yourself. Yes. Can I be consistent? Yes. Can I be this exactly.

That I want to build? Yeah. You’re not focusing on people around you and what they have, you’re focusing on what you’re building for yourself. Exactly. And so again guys, these are just. You know, this is my mom. This is who raised me. This is the person that gave me all the, the, the wisdom and insight as I watched her.

Not just tell me these things, but also live these things in her life. And I wanted to bring her on the podcast today because I really thought that it would be cool to hear from my mom because she’s got a lot of just. Wisdom and she is just a fun Puerto Rican mom. And I thought for the last part of the episode, we could do some rapid fire questions if you’re down.

Sure. Let’s see. Okay. Okay. Okay. So mom, if you have to give a book to somebody, what book would it be? The Bible.

Annette Pryor: Ooh. Why do you say that? Because it’s, I have a, a lot of learnings, a lot of teaching. It’s a lot of things inside the book that as I’m trying to read it, I’m thinking, oh my God, this is one of the best books up there for anything.

Yeah. It’s like, it helps you with relationships with forgiveness, helps you with Finances. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. It helps you with everything. Yeah.

Dr. Sandra Pagenta: So if you had to give a mom hack one thing that as you were raising three kids and trying to keep everybody straight and in the, and on their way to the, the, the straight and narrow path of laugh.

Yes. If you had to give a mom hack to a, a mom today that was like, I’m struggling, help me out. What would you, what

Annette Pryor: would you share? That everybody’s gonna go through those times and that you need to Take, breathe in 10 times in and out and then assess the, assess the issues and then make the best decision. Okay. For your family.

Dr. Sandra Pagenta: Oh, interesting. Were you breathing 10 times Whenever I’d call you on in college

Annette Pryor: about that? Sometimes one. Alright. Okay. That’s funny.

Dr. Sandra Pagenta: And for the last question of the podcast, mom How did you pick the name, Sandra?

Annette Pryor: Well, I have a sister named Sandra, and I thought that she did a lot for our family, and I thought that having her name passed down it would it, it means a lot to you would honor her.

Yeah, honor her. That’s why I did it.

Dr. Sandra Pagenta: That’s very cool. Mom, thanks for coming on the podcast too.

Annette Pryor: Ah, thank you for having me. I love it. Yeah, isn’t it fun? Yeah, it’s a lot of fun.

Dr. Sandra Pagenta: And guys, again, and don’t forget to enjoy the journey of your career and to all the moms that listen out in the podcast, I hope you had a wonderful Mother’s Day.

Thanks for tuning in guys, and we’ll catch you next week.